A Meaningless Diagnosis – My Ordeal With Autism

I’m very sure if you were in my position, you wouldn’t have had any reason to be calm. That very day, I sat across from the psychiatrist, holding my wife’s hand as our two-year-old son played inattentively in the background. “The severity of your son’s autism will likely prevent him from ever being independent. It is very possible that he will never speak or have friends. The co-morbidity of mental retardation will compound these challenges.” The psychiatrist paused and examined our expressions. My wife clenched my hand a little tighter, but she, too, smiled because we knew firsthand that the diagnosis was meaningless: When I was three, a psychologist told my parents the same thing about me.

Maybe if I had not (had this same experience) also been diagnosed with autism, I might have lost my calm as a father at that point. Although I believed that even with tremendous effort, a  strategy that works well with one child or teenager may not work with another, I also tried to be at my best mood and hold my calm, being optimistic that it was going to be the same old story.

I alone noticed the tears which dropped from my wife’s cheek as we rode back home. Our son was still very much engaged playing with some toys at the back seat of the car. I could remember our journey back home; it was so solemn, as if we had lost someone so dear to us already.

The both of us were uneasy, but having gathered from my experience, my ordeal with autism, we did our best as regards taking the news with a strong heart. We knew that even if every child with autism can learn to communicate, it might not always be through spoken language. Nonverbal individuals with autism have much to contribute to society and can live fulfilling lives with the help of visual supports and assistive technologies.

Although we tried our possible best, things never seemed the same after that day. The whole house moved in for some re-adjustment. My wife had lessened her work time at confectionery store, myself on the other hand had also stopped working extra hours in a bid to pay more attention to our child, although we had a Nanny who always took care of him.

The presence of autism in my life outgrew my mind a thousand times over. Parenting a child with autism was counter-intuitive. You say and do things you never thought would work, but they do. Years have passed, and our little boy is doing fine, thanks to certain steps we took in managing his condition. Indeed the psychiatrist made a meaningless diagnosis about our son.

autism

Here is a small list of techniques that we used daily to help reduce tantrums, increase understanding, direction following and happiness.

Encourage play and social interaction: Children learn through play, and that includes learning language. Interactive play provides enjoyable opportunities for you and your child to communicate. Try a variety of games to find those your child enjoys. Also try playful activities that promote social interaction. Examples include singing, reciting nursery rhymes and gentle roughhousing. During your interactions, position yourself in front of your child and close to eye level – so it’s easier for your child to see and hear you.

Imitate your child: Mimicking your child’s sounds and play behaviors will encourage more vocalizing and interaction. It also encourages your child to copy you and take turns. Make sure you imitate how your child is playing – so long as it’s a positive behavior.

Focus on nonverbal communication: Gestures and eye contact can build a foundation for language. Encourage your child by modeling and responding these behaviors. Exaggerate your gestures. Use both your body and your voice when communicating – for example, by extending your hand to point when you say “look” and nodding your head when you say “yes.” Use gestures that are easy for your child to imitate.

Leave “space” for your child to talk: It’s natural to feel the urge to fill in language when a child doesn’t immediately respond. But it’s so important to give your child lots of opportunities to communicate, even if he isn’t talking. When you ask a question or see that your child wants something, pause for several seconds while looking at him expectantly. Watch for any sound or body movement and respond promptly.

Focus on what you want the child to do, not what you want them to STOP doing.
Due to the effects of autism, a child might always be found screaming. At this point, it is not advised that you scream back at he/she with crazed eyes and clinched fists.
Minimize the use of ‘don’t’ and ‘stop.’ For example, ‘Walk on the sidewalk’ can be much more effective than ‘Don’t walk on the grass’ for a child who might not hear the ‘don’t’—or for one who isn’t sure where the acceptable place to walk might be. This lets the child know exactly what you WANT them to do. ‘Stop screaming’ becomes, ‘Quiet please’, ‘Don’t color on the table’ becomes ‘Only color on the paper’. It’s counter-intuitive to the ways most of us usually parent but it works.

 

There is no one thing that works for all children, and there is no one quick fix, however, many of these techniques will work for many children. Whether or not they have autism.

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  115. In line with my research, after a foreclosures home is marketed at an auction, it is common for the borrower in order to still have any remaining balance on the financial loan. There are many creditors who make an effort to have all costs and liens cleared by the following buyer. On the other hand, depending on specified programs, regulations, and state guidelines there may be a few loans that are not easily settled through the transfer of loans. Therefore, the obligation still remains on the lender that has obtained his or her property in foreclosure. Thank you sharing your opinions on this weblog.

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  145. One thing is that when you’re searching for a student loan you may find that you will need a co-signer. There are many cases where this is true because you might discover that you do not employ a past credit ranking so the loan company will require that you have someone cosign the financing for you. Great post.

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  148. Thanks for your beneficial post. Over time, I have been able to understand that the symptoms of mesothelioma are caused by the actual build up connected fluid between lining in the lung and the breasts cavity. The infection may start within the chest location and multiply to other body parts. Other symptoms of pleural mesothelioma include weight reduction, severe inhaling and exhaling trouble, nausea, difficulty eating, and swelling of the face and neck areas. It should be noted that some people having the disease do not experience almost any serious indicators at all.

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  150. One other issue is that if you are in a problem where you do not have a co-signer then you may actually want to try to make use of all of your money for college options. You can get many funds and other scholarships or grants that will ensure that you get funding to assist with institution expenses. Thank you for the post.

  151. I have taken note that of all types of insurance, health insurance is the most dubious because of the clash between the insurance policy company’s need to remain profitable and the consumer’s need to have insurance coverage. Insurance companies’ earnings on wellness plans are low, consequently some corporations struggle to generate income. Thanks for the strategies you write about through this website.

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  157. Thanks for the helpful post. It is also my belief that mesothelioma has an extremely long latency interval, which means that symptoms of the disease may not emerge till 30 to 50 years after the primary exposure to asbestos fiber. Pleural mesothelioma, that’s the most common style and influences the area throughout the lungs, will cause shortness of breath, chest muscles pains, and also a persistent coughing, which may result in coughing up our blood.

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  159. You could definitely see your enthusiasm in the work you write. The world hopes for more passionate writers like you who aren’t afraid to say how they believe. Always go after your heart.

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